Eating Cheese Can Alter Your Dreams

[DudeAsInCool]

Study: Eating Cheese Can Alter Your Dreams

All Things Considered, September 16, 2005 · According to a new study by the British Cheese Board, different cheeses can give you different types of dreams. None of the study volunteers reported nightmares from their bedtime snack. NPR's Melissa Block talks about the results of the study with Nigel White, secretary of the British Cheese Board.

Listen to the story here:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4851485

[Potato]

Dreams are interesting things.

[slum_goddess]

oh definitely. :)

[DudeAsInCool]

I know eatin goat cheese has altered Redneck's

[MrBag]

speaking of cheese. i met a dancer once who asked me if i Clog... i told her, only when i eat CHEESE :

Edited September 19, 2005 by MrBag

[CTC Command]

The Cheese Shop by Monty Python

(a customer walks in the door)

Customer: Good Morning.

Owner: Good morning, Sir. Welcome to the National Cheese Emporium!

Customer: Ah, thank you, my good man.

Owner: What can I do for you, Sir?

Customer: Well, I was, uh, sitting in the public library on Thurmon Street just now, skimming through Rogue Herrys by Hugh Walpole, and I suddenly came over all peckish.

Owner: Peckish, sir?

Customer: Esuriant.

Owner: Eh?

Customer: 'Ee, ah wor 'ungry-loike!

Owner: Ah, hungry!

Customer: In a nutshell. And I thought to myself, "a little fermented curd will do the trick," so, I curtailed my Walpoling activites, sallied forth, and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy comestibles!

Owner: Come again?

Customer: I want to buy some cheese.

Owner: Oh, I thought you were complaining about the bazouki player!

Customer: Oh, heaven forbid: I am one who delights in all manifestations of the Terpsichorean muse!

Owner: Sorry?

Customer: 'Ooo, Ah lahk a nice tuune, 'yer forced too!

Owner: So he can go on playing, can he?

Customer: Most certainly! Now then, some cheese please, my good man.

Owner: (lustily) Certainly, sir. What would you like?

Customer: Well, eh, how about a little red Leicester.

Owner: I'm, a-fraid we're fresh out of red Leicester, sir.

Customer: Oh, never mind, how are you on Tilsit?

Owner: I'm afraid we never have that at the end of the week, sir, we get it fresh on Monday.

Customer: Tish tish. No matter. Well, stout yeoman, four ounces of Caerphilly, if you please.

Owner: Ah! It's beeeen on order, sir, for two weeks. Was expecting it this morning.

Customer: 'T's Not my lucky day, is it? Aah, Bel Paese?

Owner: Sorry, sir.

Customer: Red Windsor?

Owner: Normally, sir, yes. Today the van broke down.

Customer: Ah. Stilton?

Owner: Sorry.

Customer: Ementhal? Gruyere?

Owner: No.

Customer: Any Norweigan Jarlsburg, per chance.

Owner: No.

Customer: Lipta?

Owner: No.

Customer: Lancashire?

Owner: No.

Customer: White Stilton?

Owner: No.

Customer: Danish Brew?

Owner: No.

Customer: Double Goucester?

Owner: (pause) No.

Customer: Cheshire?

Owner: No.

Customer: Dorset Bluveny?

Owner: No.

Customer: Brie, Roquefort, Pol le Veq, Port Salut, Savoy Aire, Saint Paulin, Carrier de lest, Bres Bleu, Bruson?

Owner: No.

Customer: Camenbert, perhaps?

Owner: Ah! We have Camenbert, yessir.

Customer: (suprised) You do! Excellent.

Owner: Yessir. It's..ah,.....it's a bit runny...

Customer: Oh, I like it runny.

Owner: Well,.. It's very runny, actually, sir.

Customer: No matter. Fetch hither the fromage de la Belle France! Mmmwah!

Owner: I...think it's a bit runnier than you'll like it, sir.

Customer: I don't care how fucking runny it is. Hand it over with all speed.

Owner: Oooooooooohhh........! (pause)

Customer: What now?

Owner: The cat's eaten it.

Customer: (pause) Has he.

Owner: She, sir.

Customer: (pause) Gouda?

Owner: No.

Customer: Edam?

Owner: No.

Customer: Case Ness?

Owner: No.

Customer: Smoked Austrian?

Owner: No.

Customer: Japanese Sage Darby?

Owner: No, sir.

Customer: You...do *have* some cheese, don't you?

Owner: (brightly) Of course, sir. It's a cheese shop, sir. We've got--

Customer: No no... don't tell me. I'm keen to guess.

Owner: Fair enough.

Customer: Uuuuuh, Wensleydale.

Owner: Yes?

Customer: Ah, well, I'll have some of that!

Owner: Oh! I thought you were talking to me, sir. Mister Wensleydale, that's my name.

Customer: (pause) Greek Feta?

Owner: Uh, not as such.

Customer: Uuh, Gorgonzola?

Owner: No.

Customer: Parmesan,

Owner: No.

Customer: Mozarella,

Owner: No.

Customer: Paper Cramer,

Owner: No.

Customer: Danish Bimbo,

Owner: No.

Customer: Czech sheep's milk,

Owner: No.

Customer: Venezuelan Beaver Cheese?

Owner: Not *today*, sir, no.

Customer: (pause) Aah, how about Cheddar?

Owner: Well, we don't get much call for it around here, sir.

Customer: Not much ca-- it's the single most popular cheese in the world!

Owner: Not 'round here, sir.

Customer: (slight pause) and what IS the most popular cheese 'round hyah?

Owner: 'Illchester, sir.

Customer: IS it.

Owner: Oh, yes, it's staggeringly popular in this manor, squire.

Customer: Is it.

Owner: It's our number one best seller, sir!

Customer: I see. Uuh...'Illchester, eh?

Owner: Right, sir.

Customer: All right. Okay. 'Have you got any?' he asked, expecting the answer 'no'.

Owner: I'll have a look, sir........nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnno.

Customer: It's not much of a cheese shop, is it?

Owner: Finest in the district!

Customer: (annoyed) Explain the logic underlying that conclusion, please.

Owner: Well, it's so clean, sir!

Customer: It's certainly uncontaminated by cheese....

Owner: (brightly) You haven't asked me about Limburger, sir.

Customer: Would it be worth it?

Owner: Could be....

Customer: Have you --SHUT THAT BLOODY BAZOUKI OFF!

Owner: Told you sir....

Customer: (slowly) Have you got any Limburger?

Owner: No.

Customer: Figures.Predictable, really I suppose. It was an act of purest optimism to have posed the question in the first place. Tell me:

Owner: Yessir?

Customer: (deliberately) Have you in fact got any cheese here at all.

Owner: Yes, sir.

Customer: Really?

(pause)

Owner: No. Not really, sir.

Customer: You haven't.

Owner: Nosir. Not a scrap. I was deliberately wasting your time, sir.

Customer: Well I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to shoot you.

Owner: Right-Oh, sir.

(The customer takes out a gun and shoots the owner)

Customer: What a *senseless* waste of human life.

[CTC Command]

This (according to http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=415585) is John Cleese's favorite sketch. The Monty Python cast was walking around one day, when one of them (I believe it was Graham Chapman) stated that he really felt like eating cheese. Someone said "Do you suppose that drugstore would have cheese?" This idea seemed so absurd that it led to a sketch in which a customer enters a drugstore asking for various types of cheeses.

After some brainstorming, Cleese asked himself why someone would be asking for cheese in a drugstore. The logical conclusion? The cheese shop didn't have any!

According to Cleese, he was terribly worried while writing that the sketch wasn't going to be funny at all. Basically, it was a list of cheeses that he had written down while researching the sketch at a local cheese shop. He kept looking up to Chapman, who would puff his pipe and calmy state that what Cleese was writing was extremely funny.

[Potato]

I should eat some cheese now.

Though, all it does is make me feel sick.

The only affect cheese has on my sleeping is that IT MAKES ME WAKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT IN PAIN.

buncha dirty liars

*walks off in a huff*

[DudeAsInCool]

I should eat some cheese now.

Though, all it does is make me feel sick.

The only affect cheese has on my sleeping is that IT MAKES ME WAKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT IN PAIN.

buncha dirty liars

*walks off in a huff*

I just made a grilled cheese and tomato sandwich --hmmm :)

[CTC Command]

I'm feeling a bit peckish myself ...lactose intolerance be damned!

time for a bit of cheddar :yup:

[Potato]

*shakes fist*