Jim Colyer
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Posts posted by Jim Colyer
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You've got that smile
Mind if I stop
Talk for a while?
Don't be alarmed
If I seem to stare
You've got that
Farrah Fawcett Hair
You're pure seventies
You're such a delight
Such an angel
Your teeth are white
My name's not Charlie
But I still care
You've got that
Farrah Fawcett Hair
This could be
1977
You could be
a little piece of heaven
In your bell bottoms
You take me back
You're like a dream
You've got the knack
Don't be alarmed
If I seem to stare
You've got that
Farrah Fawcett Hair
JimColyer.com
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Sunday morning
Soaking in the tub
Listening to ABBA
Can't get enough
Those songs are classics
They fade for a while
But always come back
They always will
They Always Come Back
Those four young Swedes
Bjorn, Benny, Agnetha, Frida
Take a chance on me
They Always Come Back
Super troupers from Stockholm
I'll always be a fan
Lay all your love on me
Fernando
Mamma Mia
SOS
Chiquitita
Honey Honey
Waterloo
Dancing Queen
Voulez-Vous
They Always Come Back
Those four young Swedes
Bjorn, Benny, Agnetha, Frida
Take a chance on me
They Always Come Back
Super troupers from Stockholm
I'll always be a fan
Lay all your love on me
Yes, ABBA
I love you
I do, I do
I do, I do, I do
They Always Come Back
Those four young Swedes
Bjorn, Benny, Agnetha, Frida
Take a chance on me
They Always Come Back
Super troupers from Stockholm
I'll always be a fan
Lay all your love on me
JimColyer.com -
70s Girls were something to see
We saw them there on our TVs
Catherine Bach as Daisy Duke
Loved to watch her sexy strut
Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman
Gave wet dreams to every man
Lynda's cleavage drove me wild
She kicked ass in 70s style
I can't forget Susan Anton
A five-foot-eleven Amazon
She had blonde hair, big blue eyes
That Golden Girl blew my mind
Charlie's Angels on the tube
Jacklyn Smith sure was cute
Farrah Fawcett had that hair
She was our 70s poster girl
Show stoppers
Jaw droppers
Show stoppers
Eye poppers
70S Girls were something to see
We saw them there on our TVs
You may recall Valerie Perrine
Man, those legs were so divine
Teri Garr and the ABBA girls
Agnetha and Frida rocked my world
So did Olivia Newton-John
Jenny Agutter in Logan's Run
Jim Colyer ascap
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I meet new guys
We get along fine
But I think about you
Half of the time
I think about how
You and I used to be
I've got to confess
Your Memory Haunts MeI know life goes on
And we can't look back
Seems we ran our course
We lost our knack
Still I watch the door
Hoping you want me
I've got to confess
Your Memory Haunts MeWe had our year
I should be grateful
Year and a half
I should be thankfulYou've got a new love
You left me behind
But I think about you
Half of the time
I think about how
You and I used to be
I've got to confess
Your Memory Haunts Me
Jim Colyer ascap -
He stepped out of King of Kings
That movie from 1961
He wasn't missing a thing
He had the shoulder length hair
And the flowing white robe
He was obviously Anglo-Saxon
And his halo shone like gold
I Saw Jesus Last Night
He sat there on my bed
Laid on his hands, spoke in tongues
We prayed together, then he said
Let's ride in my flying saucer
See places you've never seen
Jupiter, Saturn, Mars and Venus
The Virgo cluster of galaxies
There were hundreds of UFO reports
As I caught a glimpse of heaven
I thought I was on LSD
Such a good time we were having
I Saw Jesus Last Night
He stepped out of King of Kings
That movie from 1961
He wasn't missing a thing
He had those spaced-out eyes
Had the nail marks in his hands
I knew he was the Son of God
I knew he was the Son of Man
When our trip was over
Jesus tucked me in bed
Visions of sugar plums
Danced in my head
Jim Colyer ascap -
He stepped out of King of Kings
That movie from 1961
He wasn't missing a thing
He had the shoulder length hair
And the flowing white robe
He was obviously Anglo-Saxon
And his halo shone like gold
I Saw Jesus Last Night
He sat there on my bed
Laid on his hands, spoke in tongues
We prayed together, then he said
Let's ride in my flying saucer
See places you've never seen
Jupiter, Saturn, Mars and Venus
The Virgo cluster of galaxies
There were hundreds of UFO reports
As I caught a glimpse of heaven
I thought I was on LSD
Such a good time we were having
I Saw Jesus Last Night
He stepped out of King of Kings
That movie from 1961
He wasn't missing a thing
He had those spaced-out eyes
Had the nail marks in his hands
I knew he was the Son of God
I knew he was the Son of Man
When our trip was over
Jesus tucked me in bed
Visions of sugar plums
Danced in my head
Jim Colyer ascap -
Half of my songs
Sound like the 60s
The other half
Sound like the 70s
What's it matter
If I'm decades behind
I like writing
Behind the timesWriting Behind The Times
Singing in the past
You know those classics
Are bound to last
We all know
Old school's here to stay
That kinda music
Won't fade awayI don't write hits
But my songs are solid
They'll be around
As long as I am
I've got my style
Ain't gonna change
Disco's stamped
On my brainWriting Behind The Times
Singing in the past
You know those classics
Are bound to last
We all know
Old school's here to stay
That kinda music
Won't fade awayElvis, Beatles
ABBA, Eagles
Ricky, Stones
Creedence, EltonWriting Behind The Times
Singing in the past
You know those classics
Are bound to last
We all know
Old school's here to stay
That kinda music
Won't fade awayJim Colyer ascap
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The wisdom of Athena
The beauty of Aphrodite
She rules like Hera
So powerful, so mightyAryan Goddess
She sustains us
Aryan Goddess
She protects usHer name is Taylor Swift
Blonde hair and blue eyes
Men worship at her feet
She came from the skyAryan Goddess
She sustains us
Aryan Goddess
She protects usShe's immortal
Superior in every way
Her youth is eternal
She'll never ageArms like Greek marble
Straight from Mount Olympus
Got cherry red lips
Pure and statuesqueAryan Goddess
She sustains us
Aryan Goddess
She protects usAryan Goddess
She sustains us
Aryan Goddess
She protects usJim Colyer ascap
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Was 6 minutes ago
But it's 2016
On Music Row
Seems like Shania
Should be having hits
Any Man Of Mine
High on the charts
Where'd The Last 20 Years Go
Somehow they slipped away
I'm half the man I was
Back in the day
How'd the good times disappear
Tell me if you know
Help me to understand
Where'd The Last 20 years go
Bill was having a picnic
Brought his women along
Monica in the White House
Soon as Hillary was gone
Paul O'Neill playing right
Derek Jeter at short
Joe Torre managed
Up in New York
Where'd The Last 20 Years Go
Somehow they slipped away
I'm half the man I was
Back in the day
How'd the good times disappear
Tell me if you know
Help me to understand
Where'd The Last 20 years go
I miss my parents
They were alive then
Our family was together
Like it had always been
Where'd The Last 20 Years Go
Somehow they slipped away
I'm half the man I was
Back in the day
How'd the good times disappear
Tell me if you know
Help me to understand
Where'd The Last 20 years go
Jim Colyer ascap -
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No matter how we live
Life is hard
No matter who we are
We're doomed from the start
A few crazy decades
To laugh and to cry
When all's said and done
We're Born To Die
My grandmother said it
Talking to herself
I picked up on it
And say it myself
There are no answers
Still we ask why
When all's said and done
We're Born To die
Life without meaning
Life without purpose
Life with no hope
Going in circles
I'm thinking of Hamlet
Clad in black
No one who leaves here
Ever comes back
A few crazy decades
To laugh and to cry
When all's said and done
We're Born To Die
Jim Colyer ascap-
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I minored in history
The study of War
Every War we fought
I was there
I fought the British
In the Revolution
I fought them again
In 1812
I fought the wetbacks
In the Mexican War
Me and James Polk
War is hell
The Civil War confused
It made no sense
Lincoln should've stopped it
Our worst president
Then came Spain
Teddy Roosevelt
I was a Rough Rider
In this event
I minored in history
The study of War
Every War we fought
I was there
The Indians were savage
They liked taking scalps
I was in the cavalry
I was there to help
I won the west
Built the railroads
I fought Sitting Bull
Spanked Geronimo
World War I
Though called the Great War
Was but a foreshadow
Of what was to come
World War II
Changed everything
I went nuclear
When it was done
I minored in history
The study of War
Every War we fought
I was there
Off to Korea
And the War of politics
Truman said we had
To contain the Communist
Vietnam was crazy
Sixty thousand died
Jane and I stopped it
LBJ lied
The wars of the Bushes
Took me to the desert
Iraq and Afghanistan
Nothing but messes
I lost the War on Terror
Muslims in the White House
Trump will save our country
Throw Obama out
I minored in history
The study of War
Every War we fought
I was there
Jim Colyer ascap
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She Used To Be Beautiful
But now she's ugly
She was so sexy
When she loved me
She used to be a ten
Now she looks like crap
She hasn't aged well
In the middle-age trap
She Used To Be Beautiful
How her hair shone
Her blue eyes sparkled
When she was young
But she went downhill
Got that sagging skin
Thirty pounds overweight
Got that double chin
Funny how women fade
Just like wilted flowers
Completely fall apart
Once they hit forty
She Used To Be Beautiful
But now she's ugly
She was so sexy
When she loved me
She used to be a stunner
When our love was new
Now she looks like Hillary
Looks like Rosie too
Jim Colyer ascap -
He told me of
An empty tomb
And how Jesus
Rose from the dead
He doesn't know
That empty tomb
Is just on paper
And in his head
Things Could Be Worse
That's what he told me
But I don't see how
If you do, show me
Things'll be better
When Jesus lifts the curse
That's what he said
Things Could Be Worse
When he was done
He passed the plate
He needed money
To perpetuate
The Lord's work
And to buy a coat
To buy a car
And pay the house note
Things Could Be Worse
That's what he told me
But I don't see how
If you do, show me
Things'll be better
When Jesus lifts the curse
That's what he said
Things Could Be Worse
I can't love Jesus
I'm not gay
I love KymBo
Cos she's a babe
Things Could Be Worse
That's what he told me
But I don't see how
If you do, show me
Things'll be better
When Jesus lifts the curse
That's what he said
Things Could Be Worse
Jim Colyer ascap-
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I'm no Genius
Average on a good day
On a bad day, well
We won't talk about it
Everything I know
Comes from reading books
The thoughts of others
I don't doubt it
I'm no Genius
I'll leave that to Lennon
John Lennon and Ray Charles
Groucho Marx and Lenin
I'm no Genius
Some call me a hack
I just like women
Especially if they're stacked
Speaking of women
They're my Achilles heel
They're my only weakness
Just to cop a feel
Just to be kissed
Just to get laid
Just to be noticed
In my old age
I'm no Genius
I'll leave that to Lennon
John Lennon and Ray Charles
Groucho Marx and Lenin
I'm no Genius
Some call me a hack
I just like women
Especially if they're stacked
Jim Colyer ascap -
I'm gonna come clean
I'm gonna admit it
I'm gonna tell all
Admit that I did it
If there's any question
Then here's my answer
I beat off to the
Solid Gold DancersMy wife was at church
She went with her mother
I turned on the TV
I thought, "Oh, brother!"
I saw them legs
I saw them prancers
I beat off to the
Solid Gold DancersGayle
Paula
Pam
Lucenda
Darcel
Chelsea
Deborah
LezlieI'm looking forward
To the next Top 10
I know right now
I'll do it again
If there's any question
Then here's my answer
I beat off to the
Solid Gold DancersJim Colyer ascap
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I Started A Religion
Centered around KymBo
She's my Muse
She's in the know
She's omniscient
She's omnipresent
She's all-wise
She's omnipotent
I Started A Religion
KymBo is my goddess
She's my guardian
I do what she says
I call on her
I obey her
I reach out
She's there
Eternal KymBo
Is on my side
Protecting me from
Cosmic rays and bad vibes
I Started A Religion
Centered around KymBo
She's my Muse
She's in the know
She's my Wonder Woman
She's my Amazon
She's the 1%
That leads me on
Jim Colyer ascap
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http://jimcolyer.com/sitebuilder/flash/player?f=/music/flash/playlist.xml%3Ft%3D111
I struggled for a week to pay my income tax
Thought I had it made and I could relax
Thought I had a refund coming in the mail
They said I owe more if I don't wanna go to jail
I had to postpone my vacation
I had Bad Information
I got along great with my boy friend
Thought I wouldn't mind getting married again
I ordered a cake, I picked out a dress
He said, "I don't love you, I couldn't care less"
Don't send those invitations
You got Bad Information
Every time I think I know what's going on
Somebody comes up and tells me I'm wrong
Somebody feels a need to set me straight
Change my way of thinking, change my fate
solo
I had an appointment at the beauty shop
Thought it was Thursday, 11 o'clock
I ran 3 red lights to get there on time
The girl said, "It's Friday at half past 9"
It's just another complication
I had Bad Information
It's one more aggravation
I got Bad Information
Jim Colyer ascap
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The Stones are a bunch of drug addicts and belong in prison.
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She's so beautiful
Looks like a goddess
Even without makeup
And her hair a mess
She's so lovely
Classic features
But tonight
She's a Blue Goddess
Blue Goddess
She lost her man
To another woman
Hard to understand
Beauty's skin deep
Not all are impressed
Under its spell
Blue Goddess
Got that body
An hourglass figure
Looking so feminine
Pretty as a picture
In her bluejeans
Sexy red dress
But tonight
She's a Blue Goddess
Blue Goddess
She lost her man
To another woman
Hard to understand
Beauty's skin deep
Not all are impressed
Under its spell
Blue Goddess
She's down in the dumps
Blue as can be
Maybe this time
She'll come with me
Blue Goddess
She lost her man
To another woman
Hard to understand
Beauty's skin deep
Not all are impressed
Under its spell
Blue Goddess
Jim Colyer ascap -
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I want a different woman
Every night
I don't care
What's wrong or right
I wanna travel
From city to city
Sleeping with women
Young and pretty
Marriage Is Too Final
And I hate in-laws
Mommies and daddies
Soon become outlaws
I'm not into weddings
Or Beatles on vinyl
I need my freedom
Marriage Is Too Final
I don't care about women
When they get old
I don't believe
In what I was told
I couldn't stay
With a horseface Carly
I couldn't love
A loudmouth Hillary
Marriage Is Too Final
And I hate in-laws
Mommies and daddies
Soon become outlaws
I'm not into weddings
Or Beatles on vinyl
I need my freedom
Marriage Is Too Final
Bring on the women
In their prime
Mid-twenties
They're so fine
Marriage Is Too Final
And I hate in-laws
Mommies and daddies
Soon become outlaws
I'm not into weddings
Or Beatles on vinyl
I need my freedom
Marriage Is Too Final
Jim Colyer ascap
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Ain't no publisher
Gonna pitch your song
Ain't no deals ...
Those days are gone
It's all on youtube
Come with me
There for the listening
Music Is FreeMusic Is Free
Music Is Free
The worldwide web
Changed everything
Music Is Free
Music Is Free
Type in my name
Watch me singAin't no label
Gonna sign you now
The Internet killed
The cash cow
Ain't no manager
With a big contract
Colonel Parker's dead
Ain't coming backMusic Is Free
Music Is Free
The worldwide web
Changed everything
Music Is Free
Music Is Free
Type in my name
Watch me singIt's a public library
No one gets paid
But if you're good
You might get laidMusic Is Free
Music Is Free
The worldwide web
Changed everything
Music Is Free
Music Is Free
Type in my name
Watch me singJim Colyer ascap
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I guess I'm gullible
A fool about my money
I keep getting taken
By sweet, young honeys
I still haven't learned
What every man should know
From the first grade on
About white trash hoes
I Keep Falling In Love
With no good women
I Keep Falling In Love
With country singers
I Keep Falling In Love
With femme fatales
I Keep Falling In Love
With Broadway Jezebels
I guess I could name them
But you know who they are
They're all on my website
And none of them stars
It seems I learned nothing
From the Maverick brothers
And how they got fleeced
By Samantha Crawford
I Keep Falling In Love
With no good women
I Keep Falling In Love
With country singers
I Keep Falling In Love
With femme fatales
I Keep Falling In Love
With Broadway Jezebels
I'm gonna change
Starting right now
No more hussies
Please show me how
I Keep Falling In Love
With no good women
I Keep Falling In Love
With country singers
I Keep Falling In Love
With femme fatales
I Keep Falling In Love
With Broadway Jezebels
Jim Colyer ascap
Nothing To Look At
in Poet's Corner: Lyrics
Posted
Thin as a rake
Lordy! Lordy!
Hair's a mess
Ugly as sin
Ain't no telling
Where she's been
Nothing To Look At
Got a big nose
Teeth are crooked
Panty line shows
Looks like Hillary
The morning after
Pocahontas
After the laughter
She wants to dance
Think I'll pass
Got no boobs
Got no ass
Nothing To Look At
She's Got No Body
Thin as a rake
Lordy! Lordy!
I'm going home
I'm outta here
She's drunk
Too much beer
JimColyer.com