crashing

[messenger]

GOODBYE MESSENGER,


Intro,

I’ve got a bottle of vodka and 7 high strength sleeping tablets mixed wit a packet of 28 parecetomels
I know what I and the world wants im ready, shall I flip a coin, well this is the last message on the messengers agenda, I thank u all for hearing my pain, or putting up with it ha ha,


Im sorry, I know I aint been great,
But lately ive been walking round with a lot of shit on my plate,
This is the face, of a broken man,
I aint the same person without u holding my hand,
And im going insane, and cocaine aint filling this hole
Im wishing this whole mess would disappear,
Im feeling distant, tears are streaming,
I thought this year ide destroyed my demons,
But it feels like frozens taking over me,
Hes got a grasp and hes choking the sober me,
I just writ a song called know lee but the truth is im a stranger, I don’t even know me,
Im lonely cold and slowly slipping back into my old ways,
And I still havent made it up too u for those old days,
I am quite literally on the verge suicide,
Death feels like my only way out, my future sight,
I might just swallow these seven sleeping tablets,
And tomorrow u can celebrate , theres nothing tragic
Cause if I aint here then u aint hurt,
No more tears, lesson learnt,

Im too far gone and too far lost
So this is the last song u ever gonna hear my voice
Cause saitens calling me hes drawing me in,
So its time for me to sing my sob storeys too him
But im gon leave this world laughing,
I chose to never let anyone have the chance too love me, im happy crashing,

I aint crashing ive already crashed,
Shattered smashed and fallen too pieces,
My peace in pieces,
Each week on Friday I attempt to drink myself to death for three days,
And I don’t know why, im confused and my rage is building,
Its like im growing backwords I was never this bad,
I miss dad, guess ill join him soon, I wish I had the answers but whats the questions,
How can I be so lost with lots of blessing,
The worlds in my hands and im happy to throw it back,
Ive lost all control and theres no going back,
Im happy too implode as I watch everything ive built explode,,
So join me in this fire and flames lets die together,
Weve tried forever together to fix this,
Im destined to end up with my wrists slit,
Cause this shit has blown out of control,
Now just to see my son I gotta pay two grand to some asshole,
Lawyers aint cheap but my son is priceless,
Im glad hes too young too digest,
She wonders why when she rings me half the time she doesn’t get a answer,
Fucking woman,

Im too far gone and too far lost
So this is the last song u ever gonna hear my voice
Cause saitens calling me hes drawing me in,
So its time for me to sing my sob storeys too him
But im gon leave this world laughing,
I chose to never let anyone have the chance too love me, im happy crashing,



But if im honest, brushing the past too one side,
I still want u in my life, til I die…. so just tonight
As I sit an cry most nights holding this blade,
Although I wanna die im not sure if this is the right way,
U might say the knife makes the pain fade,
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggghhhhhhhhh
Pain is love,
My sins are washing away….. Oh no…… wait its blood,
The hated thug is willing to throw in the towel,
I got a bottle of vodka and those sleeping pills the doctor gave me over there waiting now,
Let me take a bow, the shows finialy ending,
Im finialy sending my last wishes,
Love is vicious but find somebody fast, I expect u already have,
And maybe u both already laugh, don’t raise my son like ur mother raised u or I raised me,
I know im crazy I know u hate me but just know that I truly do love u,
I got lost and confused, but ull always be the best I ever had theres knowone above u,
If elijahs ask don’t show him the pain I had inside me,
Remember the old me , there is love an a truly great man inside me,
We both know it…………
And when people ask why….. Well I got weak and tired of life
I wanna die im too tired too fight,
Ive been fighting for twenty four years and I have nothing left to give,
This breath to live is choking me im cold and wanna warm up in hell,
Where I belong, Elijah im sorry I broke my promise, daddys failed,


Im too far gone and too far lost
So this is the last song u ever gonna hear my voice
Cause saitens calling me hes drawing me in,
So its time for me to sing my sob storeys too him
But im gon leave this world laughing,
I chose to never let anyone have the chance too love me, im happy crashing,

Its rare to see a fourth verse but son ur worth it,
Having u has made these twenty four years of struggle worth it,
U are truly perfect, I don’t deserve you,
Ur the last piece of the bright light that once was my heart,
As my vision blurs and things start to go dark ,
U put a smile on my face, Took away my tears,
Helped me forget and erase my childhood years,
Ur why I struggled why I breathed,
Why a nobody drug dealer, became qualified and self employed at twenty three,
Im very misunderstood not a lot of people get me,
And my ambition and determination scared people so they chose to resent me,
Being different scares people, but be different and shine,
don’t let the world destroy u or ur life learn from mine,
In time you’ll find your place in life,
But don’t get too comfortable, be prepared to fight,
I didn’t leave this world cause I didn’t love you,
I left because I did, and I wish for last time I could hug you,
Son I love you.

Every show has to come too an end , the liam shows over, its frozen turn, let me take a bow, I thank u all for reading,

Edited July 18, 2010 by messenger

[DudeAsInCool]

Messenger, we love you. If you need someone to talk with, we are here.

If you would like someone to talk to, call Befrienders at any of the following numbers. They will know what you are going through and and are there to help:

08 457 909090 or 44 1603 611 311 or 1850 609090

PS Nice heartfelt lyrics

[messenger]

i know its graphic, thanks alot for what u said, it means alot times are hard but ive seen worse, im not gonna be doing anything silly, i writ this 2 months ago when the site was down, im actualy gonna be going back to an old alias as frozen, im saying goodbye to the charecter i created, messenger, and im gonna bring back a darker charecter called frozen, there is another song which ill post tomorrow called return of frozen

[DudeAsInCool]

Thanks for this. We care about all our members - I was moments away from calling Midland Police to make sure you are ok. Sorry to see our good friend Messenger go, but I'm delighted someone new is taking his place

All's well that ends well. Your words were powerful - which indicates you have a talent to write and move people

[messenger]

[quote name='DudeAsInCool' date='09 July 2010 - 05:50 PM' timestamp='1278715853' post='189745']
Thanks for this. We care about all our members - I was moments away from calling Midland Police to make sure you are ok. Sorry to see our good friend Messenger go, but I'm delighted someone new is taking his place

All's well that ends well. Your words were powerful - which indicates you have a talent to write and move people
[/quote]

thanks dude as in cool, messenger is my truthfull side, i wanna play around a bit a try some new stuff, this peice is a true reflection of my feelings at the time, but i express my feelings liricly,
it might not be the last u see of messenger but i feel i cant take it much further at present, i want too try some new things, but thanks again for the concern,

[Shawn]

Disturbing piece.

Next time, if you don't want us shitting our britches, you might remind us that it's a piece.

[DudeAsInCool]

[quote name='Shawn' date='09 July 2010 - 04:39 PM' timestamp='1278718743' post='189750']
Disturbing piece.

Next time, if you don't want us shitting our britches, you might remind us that it's a piece.
[/quote]


It was a gotcha poem