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The 25 Worst Hair Metal Bands


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Opinions expressed here aren`t necessarily those of the management.... B)

What a list...as a metalhead and a student of 80`s hair metal i hardly agree with any of it.... :lol:


images: Fair Use/Screengrab: The 25 Worst Hair Metal Bands....LIZZY BORDEN



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NOTE: This article is 16 months old...

Definitely agree:

20) Trixter: The glam metal band from New Jersey who weren't related to Bon Jovi. It might have helped. Word is they're coming back in 2008. I guess the Puppet Show at Six Flags is in need of an opening act this year. What Trixter lacked in originality--they had tunes named "Surrender" (not a Cheap Trick cover) and "One In A Million" (not the Guns n' Roses tune)--they made up for with, well, their lack of originality.

14) Stryper: Christian Metal is just wrong, and quite possibly an oxymoron. I suppose you could say it's more rebellious since it rebels against the traditional concept of rebellion. But then that would make activities such as mowing the lawn, doing the dishes and getting a haircut all part of a Satanic plot. I go with that King Of The Hill show that, when confronted with a Christian rock band, laid it out straight with something like this: you're not making Christianity better, you're making rock n' roll worse.

6) Europe: What does it tell you about a band when their most successful album, in Europe's case The Final Countdown, inspires its guitar player to leave? Millions buy the album. Radio and TV play the song and video and the people who create it question what the hell they're doing. The guitarist in question did eventually return--but only years later, when I guess he ran out of other things to do.

Definitely disagree:

21) Lizzy Borden: In retrospect, these guys weren't so much bad as indistinguishable from the many other talents of their era. They didn't overplay any more than usual and they never had a singer who made you want to jump out of a moving vehicle. And that's what's really wrong here. Lizzy Borden evoke no reaction whatsoever. You might as well be listening to air.

17) Dokken: Formed in the 1970s, these heavy metal lifers, after a few years of false starts, finally got to consistently make records in the 1980s just in time to be too late. Or is that too old? Youth culture can be cruel if you're not Ozzy Osbourne--then you're just grandpa. As for Don Dokken, no matter how many hits he has--and he's had quite a few--he still ends up being everyone else's opening act. And that tells us something.

13) Great White: Even before the great fire in that small Rhode Island club that stained whatever legacy they'd aimed for, Great White were responsible for bland, routine glam metal that screwed up a perfectly good Ian Hunter song in "Once Bitten, Twice Shy." The band has also suffered enough line-up changes that even their founder Jack Russell has taken to calling different line-ups "Fake White."

5) Whitesnake: Whitesnake were around for so long that we're ignoring their decade as a blues band to focus on their decade as a vehicle for the dissemination of once-upon-a-wife Tawny Kitaen videos. Singer David Coverdale got so tired of being compared to Led Zeppelin's Robert Plant that he signed up with Zep's Jimmy Page and formed the imaginatively titled Coverdale-Page. When that didn't go so well, Page re-found Robert Plant and Coverdale re-found Whitesnake. Reality TV re-found Tawny. This is starting to sound Biblical.

4) W.A.S.P.: "We Are Sexual Perverts"? "We Are So Perfect"? "We Ain't Sure, Pal"? "We Are (expletive deleted) Performers"? Coming from the same scene as Motley Crue, RATT and Quiet Riot, W.A.S.P. excelled at being the "least good" of the batch. For their efforts, they were razzed by the Parents Music Resource Center, a group of Washington Wives who would've made an even worse band had they picked up instruments. Tipper Gore, contrary to speculation, was no Tawny Kitaen..

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What Trixter lacked in originality--they had tunes named "Surrender" (not a Cheap Trick cover) and "One In A Million" (not the Guns n' Roses tune)--they made up for with, well, their lack of originality... :lol: :lol:



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