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What's the worst movie you're seen... lately?


Shawn

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I'm talking about those gems that are only really worth watching for the twisted emotions evolked.

Today I started into a doozey but had to give it up after only about 20 minutes.

It was a beaut called "Jesus Christ - Vampire Hunter". The premise was that Jesus was walking the streets of Ottawa battling the local lesbian-depleting vampire forces with his amazing kung fu abilitites. That's all I'm going to say. You really had to see it to believe it.

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What would possess you to watch something with a description like that?

I haven't had much time to watch movies lately.... just saw Garden State, Closer, and The Machinist. Liked all three, but on different levels.

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I have a certain facination with extremely bad movies and music to go along with my facination with the great ones. :yup:

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The worst movie I ever saw was "Jack Frost" (the horror movie version).

Besides 72 plot holes not related to a killer snow man made out of cheap foam (also including a visible ZIPPER on the back of the shitty costume), it also had the most retarded villain any movie has ever seen.

That's right; it's a killer snow man who stabs people with ice and carrots.

Want to know how they kill him? I knew you would!

You see, they are driving this 4x4 truck, and they happen upon a small display of anti-freeze in a store window (4 or 5 bottles worth; each about the size of a gallon of milk). They then proceed to fill the ENTIRE bed of the truck (yes, to the brim) with just those bottles.

They hunt down frosty and they somehow end up on the second floor of a house where they conveniently push his jack (frost) ass out a window and down into the bed of the truck which kills him.

It was at this point that I had an aneurism and almost died (and after that movie, I kind of wanted to).

At least it provided some laughs though.

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i haven't seen any new films lately but we rented 'vanilla sky' last week--ten minutes in, we began dissing the dialogue, cruise &c...this is one of the very few we dint bother watching to the end.

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I've watched all bad movies ever made. I love them.

I've got to see those movies mentioned above and btw I have a Chuck Norris collection. By far the worst famous actor ever. A hero to me.

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i haven't seen any new films lately but we rented 'vanilla sky' last week--ten minutes in, we began dissing the dialogue, cruise &c...this is one of the very few we dint bother watching to the end.

I had the same reaction to Vanilla Sky. Another unsatisfying movie from the last couple of years was The Stepford Wives. Worst movie I've paid theater price to see in a long time....

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You guys should check out "The Suckling" this is gooood shit.....

A brief abstract:

n opening crawl, before the credits, assures the gullible members of the audience that on April 1, 1973, a crime occurred unequalled in "all of Brooklyn's modern history." Twelve people were found dead inside a house of prostitution that doubled as an illegal abortion clinic. The one survivor was a young woman who told a tale so fantastic that she was immediately committed to a mental asylum. Experts researched the case for years, without finding an explanation. Only the brave filmmakers believe the poor young woman's tale to be true.

So this story of an aborted fetus, flushed down the toilet and mutated by a close encounter with toxic waste until it becomes a 7-foot-tall, slimy, fanged monster that within hours returns to that abortion clinic to cocoon it with something that looks like yarn and munch down on the inhabitants while periodically saying "Raaaaaarr!" is, in effect, a docudrama. :lol:

Edited by joeyz
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  • 3 weeks later...

Jackass may be the worst movie I have seen recently. I walked out when the dude started eating the snowcone someone pissed on.

In the old days, it has to be a tie between Clockwork Orange and Cabaret. Both made me physically ill.

100 Movies http://jimcolyer.com/papers/entry?id=28

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In the old days, it has to be a tie between Clockwork Orange...

Sacrilege!

I thought Dirty Water or whatever it was called was pretty awful. Jennifer Connelly couldnt even make up for it... :(

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I saw a made-for-TV movie over the weekend on the USA network...the name was 10.5, about a huge earthquake wreaking havoc in California. It was so awful that I had to keep watching, just to see if it got even more awful. I was absorbed in it's awfulness. Beau Bridges played the U.S. president, and he looked eerily like Jeb Bush....

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Clockwork Orange and Cabaret.

clockwork orange and cabaret......two of my favourite movies with two of my favourite actors ..(Malcom McDowell and Liza Minelli).. and certainly one of my favourite directors...Stanley Kubrick....clockwork orange cleverly and artfully (and violently) signalled the change in social attitudes from the summer of love of the `60`s to the nasty 70`s and beyond..a great movie.....a great social commentary.... :)

post-123-1122435107.jpg

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the change in social attitudes from the summer of love of the `60`s to the nasty 70`s and beyond

*mirthless laughter* i totally agree w/you...no surprise there :lol:

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  • 2 weeks later...

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